Grieving

“Giving yourself permission to grieve means coming to the realization it is okay to not be okay.” 

Natasha Smith 

The day before my mom passed away, the Lord said, “It’s time to say good-bye.” 

 I told Him, “I can’t do this, Lord.”

God gently replied, “You can’t, but WE can, Norma.” 

One of the key truths God taught me as I grieved the loss of my precious mama was that I don’t have to grieve alone. God wants to sit with us and grieve with us. Isaiah 53:3a says that Jesus was “a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief.” Knowing Jesus was a man who suffered and was familiar with pain makes Him the perfect partner to grieve with.

My Counselor, the Holy Spirit, showed me how to grieve. Upon returning home after Mom's memorial service in Arizona, He instructed me to lay down the work of ministry responsibilities. I took a break from writing weekly blog posts and meeting with those I mentored. Grief was the work He called me to do. He wanted me to rest, grieve, ponder, and reflect and to set my bar of expectations low for what I hoped to get done in my daily obligations.

Our bodies and souls are tired during the grieving process. God encouraged me to practice self-compassion and to be free to roll with the waves of grief as they crested upon the shore of my heart. The Lord persuaded me to get more rest than I thought I needed. He reminded me that just as a broken wrist requires extra sleep for the bone to heal, so too does a broken heart need additional rest to heal. So, most afternoons I took a nap.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve; I allowed myself to have no judgments in how I grieved. I showed kindness to my soul by making lots of opportunities for silence, solitude, and stillness, as well as taking deep breaths and slowly exhaling my angst. I intentionally slowed my pace and made space to listen, journal, and weep. Grieving cannot be rushed and is something we grow through. Healing eventually comes as we process our loss.

“Grief is perhaps the most profound way of expressing love.” 

Zig Ziglar 

Relevant Reflection: 

How do you grieve?

Image by Myriams-Fotos from Pixabay